Two days ago when I started this blog, I could have never dreamed of all the luxuries and benefits its success would provide us: huge quantities of exotic coffee (did you know they make something called a "TRENTA"? It makes you see into the future), drinks by the pool (extra gin for her!), an exotic dinner (ocean fish with extra mercury please!), a big flat screen TV (ok, we already had that and its not really very big, but I'm running out of things to list...) The point is now that we've gotten a taste of the beautiful life it'd be hard pressed to give it up. So then of course this inevitable conversation happened.
Beth: You may be jinxing us with your blog thingy you know.
Me: So what? We already said we don't care if we don't ever have children.
Beth: No, I mean what if I actually GET pregnant? Then you won't have anything to write about.
And then I had a realization.
If I ever think, even for a
SECOND, that this blog is in any conceivable way, shape, or form getting in the way of my newlywed sexy time, I will shut this bastard down faster than you can say
Plan B.
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In other news, here is what it would have looked like if I had been passing the crack pipe to my nonpregnant* bride on our wedding day. We
should could have done it because there was no possibility of her having a crack baby. And I think you know why.
"Nonpregnant is a word. Yes it is. Here,
look it up.
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